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Grassroots activist, feminist, sociologist, poop talk pro, future foster mom, travel whore, thrift store junky, music and food consumer.

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Dear Young Girl, From Woman

Young girls strut with their heads held high to the sky. Wear short skirts to show off their thighs and welcome the flirts. You see any woman who's worth having is one who's considered attractive. So young girls solicit sex, welcome cat calls, engage in their destruction, and rename their men dogs.

Girls grow into women who hold their heads to the sky. Because every woman knows that a woman ain't not a woman unless men approach regularly in hopes of getting him some rise. A woman's confidence is now based on how many guys want to get in between her thighs. Deflower her. A man's confidence is now based on his ability to pick petals from her stem and watch her shrivel up and die. Play "her."

Well, if a guy sayin he wants to fuck you gets you soft then you should get that same feeling when I flip you off. You see a fuck you is a fuck you regardless of how you're getting it. Whether it comes from a hopeful in hopes of hittin it or a middle finger and a face of discontent, its still a fuck you!

Yep, here I go on my feminism shit. Its just that pretending men and women are so different sets my emotions adrift. But I can't play ignorant because I do get how you can allow your worth to be reduced to a couple of outfits, acrylics, and your rent. I know you have your reasons for existing the way you exist, but giving in to your weaknesses to the point that you hurt you is still a bunch of bullshit.

I get that its not easy to love yourself when your daddy didn't...well at least not 100%. Your mother had an abundance of love for you but even it came with conditions. And the men she tended to choose was done so using her inhibitions. How could she have married him when he doesn't like or even want kids?! And if he likes kids, its only at night when the only monster frightening is him. So instead of nurturing he begins to prepare precious children for a lifetime of choosing men just like him.

But its not always to that degree. Sometimes its just that mama spent so much time compensating for daddy leaving that she wasn't around enough for qt. Every now and then she would make a remark acknowledging your beauty. Tell you to be independent but not explain what that really means. She thought she was preparing you for an inevitable fate because it seems that men nowadays do things their own way. They don't know what it means to look longevity in the face. For them fatherhood and wedding vows doesn't translate that they need to stay. Society has deemed that they're free to do as they please. But to personify society as if it doesn't include you and me would mean that men and women are not responsible for the way men and women think.

Even so, being irresponsible can't be a blanket statement for all men. Fact of the matter is I know a lot of men who work hard to disregard the previously mentioned trend. Truth is, we have to stop fronting. Cant keep blaming all our misfortunes on a man or a woman. Can't attribute it on all the game playing and be reluctant to admit that it takes TWO. In case you didn't know, the common denominator in all of your failed relationships is YOU.

Young girls hold their heads to the sky as they cry. And as those tears fall down from their eyes, they just might never realize that they're in for a lifetime of baby daddy drama and never getting along with their mamas. Along so many journeys, mama's tried to give advice on men and daughters closed their ears and minds. Learn from her mistakes she says but daughters don't receive that line. Its hard to when mama mothered 4 children by 3 men, and trapped the last one with a lie. Maybe you've heard it a few times, "I'm pregnant and its yours." Straight faced and eye to eye. Through a young intellect's mind always in the mood to analyze, daughters are left trying to find how to interpret mama's sins with men and not become a victim of her lies. So they go out and jump in bed with the 1st promise of relief, which comes in addition to incense, maybe candles, and silk sheets.

Young girls grow into women who hold their heads to the sky as they cry. And as those tears fall down from their eyes, they just might begin to realize that they're in for a lifetime of ups and downs and ins and outs. Be it career and/or love they're just as fucked. Because a damaged woman doesn't do anything better than hold a grudge. A grudge that began to form back when she was young. When giving it up to keep a man was the norm. When the acceptance of peers meant you had to conform. Her friends were giving it up so the boys expected her to. So what did she do? The only thing that seemed right to do: Fake orgasms with her face screwed and tell her friends how it was so cool. All the while disregarding guideline number two: The most important person needed to love you is you.

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